Why Is It Hard To Love People Who Don’t Love Themselves?

The problem with people who don’t love themselves is that they believe they are not worthy of others. Their fear of abandonment makes them more prone to it.

Falling in love with people who don’t love themselves can be a really difficult mission.

The main reason is that when you love someone, you always want to remind them that they are wonderful. A person who does not like himself, has difficulty accepting this kind of comments.

People who dislike each other have a habit of dismissing compliments without realizing the pain it can cause in others. For this reason, we are all looking for someone who values ​​themselves.

The previous explanation is not the only reason that loving someone who doesn’t love themselves is difficult. Here are other interpretations:

Communication is difficult

Communication can become quite an odyssey if you’re in a relationship with someone who doesn’t know how to love themselves.

These people often misinterpret the things you say and always think the worst.

For many people, going through this kind of situation is very frustrating. In most cases, those who do not love each other are simply projecting their own faults on their spouse.

For example, you may complete a good idea that your partner had, something quite common, but the other may take your attitude as condescending or as if you were lying to them.

It is not easy to take care of someone who does not take care of themselves

hard to love people who don't love each other

For anyone, it can be disappointing to love someone who is not taking care of themselves.

Simple spontaneous sentences like “you think you are fine today” can become a topic of discussion  due to their low self-esteem.

It is very normal that because of their problem of insecurity, these people start to blame everything you say.

It’s exhausting wasting time and energy trying to make the person you love smile and not get the results you want.

After all, no matter how hard you try, they’re unlikely to trust you or value your words.

People who don’t love themselves tend to become overly addicted

It is customary, to its full extent, that when your partner is feeling sad or negative, they believe in you and count on you to support them and make them feel better. This is certainly what you would expect from the other person as well.

This behavior becomes unhealthy when you depend on your partner to be happy. Extreme addiction can lead to your partner becoming asphyxiating.

Chances are, they might think you will abandon them. Over time, you will start to think that it may not be such a bad idea and the reason for your happiness will fly away.

People who don’t love themselves often refuse help from others

When you love someone, you want to help them seek their own happiness.

However you must remember that the denial of herself existed long before you knew her, and for that she will not want to receive help from anyone.

This will complicate matters since, although you may think that at some point she will accept your help, in reality it is unlikely to happen.

You have to remember that you cannot change others. No one is able to transform their essence to be what you would like them to be or to achieve what you expect.

Trust in the relationship ends up breaking down frequently

difficult to love people who don't love each other: trust

When someone doesn’t love themselves for who they are, they don’t understand that other people can love them.

They are constantly worried that their partner will “realize” what they suppose to be and end the relationship.

These kinds of things make it very difficult to establish a bond of trust with your spouse.

A person who is constantly anxious or worried that the other is going away, often has negative behaviors. The irony is that it is this fear that will definitely make his partner move away.

What you need to know if you love someone who dislikes themselves

If you have the ability to be around someone who doesn’t love yourself, that means you are a warm and protective person.

However, believing that a simple conversation will fix everything is not correct.

If you are really ready to help your partner stop valuing themselves, you have to consider, first of all, that it is the person themselves who really wants to change and accept the help you offer them.

You have to be careful, because when you feel that you are physically or emotionally exhausted from a relationship, it is very possible that it is a situation that you need to get out of.

In this case, you should ask yourself the following questions:

  • I really think my partner can change?
  • My partner is aware that I am not happy?
  • Do you really have an interest in changing?

Once you’ve answered these questions, you’ll know whether or not it’s worth your while to keep trying.

After all, you don’t have to sacrifice your own happiness with someone who doesn’t want to stop being unhappy.

Remember that the one responsible for your own happiness is you, just as your partner should be responsible for theirs.

  • Bigi, M. (2015). El modelo de los cinco factores de la persona y la teoría triangular del amor. Revista Investigación In Social Psicology.
  • Aiquipa Tello, JJ (2015). Dependencia emocional. Revista de Psicología.
  • Rodríguez, I. (2013). LA DEPENDENCIA EMOCIONAL EN LAS RELACIONES INTERPERSONALES. ReiDoCrea. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.engstruct.2015.06.053

Related Articles

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Back to top button